Four Low-Effort Ways to Manage Intrusive Thoughts When You Have ADHD (Part 1)
Four low-effort ways to manage intrusive thoughts when you have ADHD (Part 1)
If you are like many of us, you’ve had a situation in which life is going along swimmingly and then you have a thought. Yeah, that thought. One that is super negative or disturbing. One that comes in without knocking on the door and wants to hang out uninvited. Sometimes the thoughts can be sexual or violent in a disturbing way. The thought might leave you thinking, “Oh no, not that thought again! How could I possibly be thinking that? What is wrong with me? That thought is nothing like who I am, or who I want to be”. This can leave us judging ourselves on top of everything else.
These unwanted thoughts that come into our heads without warning are defined as intrusive thoughts. If we’re lucky, the intrusive thought passes through our minds quickly and with little consequence. Some days, however, the thought may take up residence for a while, telling us that because we have those thoughts, something must be wrong with us. An added issue for those of us with ADHD is that the thoughts just..keep..coming, and they may not have any connection one to another. “I have to take out the garbage. What’s my high school best friend up to? What am I having for lunch today?”, for example. In a case like this, sometimes it’s difficult to slow down enough to focus on one thought before another arises.
Intrusive thoughts can come up at the most inopportune times, and without warning. So how can we effectively deal with these thoughts in a way in which we don’t get too hung up on them? Below is a list of some techniques that have been proven to be successful for those of us that deal with intrusive thoughts. Let’s explore some ways to manage our intrusive thoughts so that when they do show up, we can put them in the right perspective.
1. Manage intrusive thoughts through mindfulness techniques.
According to mindfulness expert Jon Kabat-Zinn, mindfulness is “awareness that arises through paying attention, on purpose, in the present moment, non-judgementally....in the service of self-understanding and wisdom”. Intrusive thoughts can be about things that have happened or will happen. In a situation in which we are experiencing intrusive thoughts, it can oftentimes be helpful to pay attention primarily to what is actually happening in our reality, in the moment. Mindfulness techniques can bring us into a state of awareness of the present moment and help us focus on what is in the here and now.
So where does one begin when they want to incorporate mindfulness into dealing with intrusive thoughts? Of the many mindfulness techniques, here is one to try that puts you back in your body and creates some distance between you and your thoughts. Start by taking a simple breath. Breathing in through your nose and out through your mouth. Notice your lungs filling up with air and then leaving your body. Notice the difference in pressure in your lungs as you let your breath flow in and out. Pay attention to the warmth of the breath. Notice the speed of the breath. Attempt to take slower and slower breaths. Good. Take breaths this way a few more times, so that you feel the rhythm of that. As thoughts arise, “breathe into” the thoughts, taking a deep breath each time an intrusive thought pops up. Doing this exercise can result in a more grounded and prepared feeling.
Another mindfulness technique that can get you into the present moment and less focused on your intrusive thoughts only would be to pay attention to your surroundings. As you begin to sense the intrusive thoughts coming, allow yourself to check in with your five senses. Take some time to listen to the sounds around you. Even in a “quiet” room, many times there are ambient sounds. You may hear voices in the background, a fan or air conditioner, or outside traffic. Next, pay attention to what is in your field of view. Look straight ahead and then slowly look around. What new details do you notice in what you are seeing? You are probably seeing things that you have seen many times before. Attempt to notice new details in these objects.
Allow yourself to feel the sensations of your body, like the air hitting your skin or the way your feet feel on the ground or in your shoes. If you are sitting in a chair, allow yourself to feel the support of the chair on your back and your rear end. If you want to try this exercise when you are eating, what smells and tastes are coming from your food? Take time to notice any flavors or unique smells in your food. Focusing on the here and now through paying attention to our senses can divert our attention from our thoughts and give us a greater sense of calm.
2. Accept that your intrusive thoughts will show up because you are human and let them pass through.
Sometimes we can get it into our heads that we shouldn’t have the thoughts we have, and that by having the thought, we are flawed and abnormal in some way. This can put us into a place of shame and pain anytime we have an unwanted thought. In a situation like this, it might help us to reframe the process of having an intrusive thought as “something that just happens” , something normal, and nothing to be ashamed of. By accepting that sometimes having intrusive thoughts will be a normal thing that our brain does, and nothing to be alarmed about, we can take the edge off when these thoughts pop up. It helps to remember that we tend to have less power over the thoughts that come into our mind than we think we do. Random thoughts come and go and if we see that as normal and go on with our lives, then the thought may have less power. The key would be to not “hook into” or ruminate on the thoughts, and let the thoughts pass on through.
In order to allow the thoughts to pass on through, it would be worth trying one of the following two visualization techniques. It might help to try these techniques in a quiet place without distraction. Allow yourself to get comfortable, sitting in a comfortable chair or lying on the floor or your bed.
For the first technique, visualize lying on your back and think of each thought as a cloud. When we watch clouds, they show up and pass through the sky. The clouds moving in and out of our field of view are not in our control. They move in and out of our part of the sky without effort. It’s just a thing that happens. We observe the cloud for a finite amount of time, and then it’s gone. Other clouds appear in our field of view, and our attention is diverted to those clouds. It might help to view our thoughts in the same way. They show up, they leave. New thoughts come in, old thoughts go out.
The second visualization exercise for allowing our thoughts to pass through was told to me many years ago and it goes like this: attempt to see yourself on a train in motion. Through the windows of the train, we see the scenery. The scenery passes by. Some of the scenery will be beautiful and interesting, some of the scenery will be mundane, like rows and rows of cornfields. Some scenery we pass by might be downright ugly. If we see something we like, we can’t choose for the train to stop so that we can continue to look at that scenery. It eventually will be out of our view. The same would go for something we see out the window that we might find unpleasant or ugly. It eventually will be too far away for us to focus on. Soon other scenes will be in our presence and we may find ourselves forgetting about those images we saw before. Viewing thoughts in this way can allow us to move on from thought to thought. They come in, they come out.
(Stay alert for Part 2 of this blog. Coming soon!)
